Turning 30 - a personal recap and lessons from my 20s
A few weeks ago, I turned 30. Somehow that number invites reflection. Not in a dramatic way, at least not yet, but in a quiet way. It feels like reaching a small checkpoint and looking back at the road behind you.
If I try to simplify my twenties, they roughly fall into three phases: starting my studies in my hometown of Ulm, moving to Heilbronn for my master's degree, and then moving to Lake Constance for my first full-time job.
During those years, a lot of things happened. Some plans worked out, others didn't. There were ups and downs, relationships that started and ended, and many moments where life went in a different direction than expected. At the same time, there were many satisfying, exciting, and fun moments. I tried new things and discovered interests that became important parts of my life: running, lifting, reading, traveling, and constantly learning about new topics out of curiosity.
Lots of things changed, and some things stayed as they always were. The connection to my hometown is still very strong. My family lives there, and many of my closest friendships today go back to kindergarten or school. At the same time, new important people entered my life along the way.
Looking back, the decade feels like a mix of exploring, learning, and slowly finding direction. And while it’s impossible to summarize ten years properly, there are a few lessons I want to take with me into the next decade.
Learnings I want to take with me
- Time Management: I want to spend my time mainly on things that feel either productive, restorative, or truly memorable. Over the years, I've noticed that some activities and people give me energy, while others drain it. I want to be more aware of that and consciously choose the first group most of the time. Sports have become an important balance for me. Reading too: it calms my mind and gives me energy, which is completely different from the constant stimulation of screens.
- Relationships: The most important relationship I will always have is the one with myself. I started building that quite late, but over time I learned to enjoy spending time alone without constantly distracting myself. At the same time, the people around us shape us more than we think. I want to surround myself with people who inspire me, challenge me, and create an environment where we genuinely want the best for each other. Fewer, but better.
- Dopamine & Habits: Modern life offers many quick dopamine shortcuts: endless scrolling, constant notifications, fast "entertainment", or, let's call it, distraction. I want to be careful with that. The good things in life usually take time: body transformation, relationships, health, skills, and so much more. Our brains adapt to what we repeat often, both good and bad. Small habits shape our minds more than we think. Losing bad habits is hard, but it's also a life skill once you've succeeded at it at least once.
- Success & Happiness: Reaching goals does not automatically create happiness. For a long time, I believed that certain achievements could bring lasting satisfaction. I don't think they do. So far, my finish line keeps moving after each success, and that's OK. Success and inner peace are two different projects. Both matter, but they require different kinds of work.
- Fast Thinking & Biases: Our brains like shortcuts. Biases, like confirmation bias, shape how we see the world. On top of that, many of our beliefs come from early childhood or other formative experiences. I want to stay aware of my patterns and keep them in mind. Understanding how my own thinking works helps me not take every thought too seriously. Sometimes it also helps me act against my first impulse and align better with my goals and inner values.
- Body & Mind: Body and mind are not separate systems. Sleep, nutrition, movement, and mental rest all influence each other. I try to take care of both. While I see a positive trend in society around fitness and nutrition, screen time and digital overstimulation seem to be rising at the same time. Protecting mental space is becoming increasingly important.
- Respect & Humility: One thing I learned in my twenties is how little I actually know. Opinions that once felt fixed can change, perspectives shift, and the world is often more complex than it seems at first. I want to keep listening to other perspectives and avoid getting trapped in my own biases. Staying humble and learning from other cultures and viewpoints has only benefited me so far.
- Curiosity & Trying New Things: School and university are only the beginning of learning. I want to stay curious and keep exploring new topics: finance, psychology, philosophy, languages, or whatever sparks my interest at that moment. The same goes for hobbies and sports. Trying things out is the only way to discover what really creates joy and passion. It also helps you stay young.
- Finances: Investing early, learning how money works, and thinking long-term have been one of the best decisions of my twenties. By maintaining a high savings rate in your first working years, you can build a bit of “fuck-you money” surprisingly fast. I learned to love that emotional dividend. Although I might use some leverage in the future, I want to prioritize liquidity and freedom of choice before building wealth on leverage.
- Alcohol: Looking back, I would approach alcohol differently. In many cultures, especially in Germany, drinking is extremely normalized. I underestimated its negative effects for a long time. Although I still enjoy a beer from time to time, I haven’t drunk heavily in the last few years, and I want to keep it that way. I might even quit entirely to help normalize non-drinking.